Personal Development
My Little Black Book: Dissolving the Fog of Vengeance
The world would be so unfair if people could do bad things and get away with it. But it happens, so it’s time to cross people off the black book and understand vengeance – so it can be dissolved. Spoiler alert: there are injustices in the world, and not everyone who is doing something wrong…
A Gay Man’s Guide To Forgiving Yourself
Forgiving yourself, or at least trying to, is to my opinion a very advanced place to be on the quest to self-healing and breaking the circle of shame. So if you are here, it means that you’ve already been through tough times thinking, asking questions, grieving, blaming, and surrendering. Over the past few weeks I’ve…
Heart for the Shirtless Selfie: The Paradox of the “Gay” Naked Body
For years I’ve been struggling with shame, thinking that I’m not good enough. But how much of it is constantly being fed by things that I don’t even notice that I’m doing? A quick search on Google images for “gay” leads the results of what Google thinks we all want to see: perfectly-shaped muscular torsos…
Gay Friendships and Why I’ve Joined Gay Group Therapy
For years I’ve been struggling with friendships. It was never easy for me to “make friends,” and since I arrived in America 11 years ago it’s only become harder. But what I’ve discovered lately is that I’m not alone in this, and it’s not just an immigrant thing. I see gay men who seem to…
Coming Out of Quarantine
As COVID-19 quarantine rules are relaxing and we’re about to go out to the world again, John Volturo, Author, Speaker, Executive Coach and dad of twin girls, shares his thoughts on how to do it wisely. Dear Dads, Guncles and others caring for our beautiful kids, We’ve been sheltering in our homes for like 100…
That Time When We Had a Huge Fight in Front of the Kids
Yes, we fight. We’re not the picture perfect couple. Sometimes we even fight in front of the kids. And when we do — we also kiss and make up in front of them. Alex and I don’t fight a lot. We fight, but since we started couples therapy it’s been so much better. I think…
A New Generation of Gay Dads
We’re the first generation of gays who can get married and have biological children in this way – and we don’t have to do everything exactly like the straight couples are doing. We can find our own way. Until I had children, every time I saw someone else’s – either in pictures or in person…